tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578565573067310873.post1784551089620259297..comments2023-10-17T03:49:53.224-07:00Comments on English 1022 Online--Spring 2010: Don't Blame the EaterBrian Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01741051992630804118noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578565573067310873.post-89155723170314746932010-02-07T17:37:55.842-08:002010-02-07T17:37:55.842-08:00I think you did a really good job with relaying Zi...I think you did a really good job with relaying Zinczenko's argument. I liked that you used facts that grabbed your attention, were informative, and can toy with emotions (in the case of the diabetic children). The only thing I think could be stronger was your argument against Campos. You mentioned that his argument is weak in places but you didn't say how or prove it. I thought that overall it was really well written, informative, and persuasive. Good job!Karihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07569190665682088555noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578565573067310873.post-75069971225820402942010-02-07T12:28:05.614-08:002010-02-07T12:28:05.614-08:00I think that your explanation of Zinczenko in the ...I think that your explanation of Zinczenko in the first paragraph is good but once you start to compare him to Campos you did not really get very detailed about what he specifically said that did not add up to Zinczenko's theory. The writing is done well though and you really get the fact that obesity is both fast food and the customers themselves that are to blame for obesity.amy lhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06350557753519451304noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578565573067310873.post-66068947188637188942010-02-07T12:05:29.130-08:002010-02-07T12:05:29.130-08:00It is so convenient to just stop at a drive throug...It is so convenient to just stop at a drive through on your way home from work. We all live busy lives and fast food establishments make it so easy to eat on the run. Of course, they also make it easy to consume 2000 calories in a sitting. Your paper was very clear to me. I think the only thing I would add is how his article is far superior to the other ones, although they all emphasize similar things. It is well organized and I think you did a great job of keeping the reader interested.Heidihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06809637059398122999noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578565573067310873.post-53299132193396239742010-02-07T00:24:10.049-08:002010-02-07T00:24:10.049-08:00You have a great argument going in this passage. I...You have a great argument going in this passage. I really liked how you attacked the argument that its everyone's responsibility to eat healthy with the argument that you can't find healthy quickly. It's a really big problem. I would also agree that explaining some parts more in depth would help. However, your most convincing part for me was how you brought it home with the long day scenario, or the cheap dollar menu. I think you're off to a great start. Maybe try incorporating a little more on how his argument is superior.beck0042https://www.blogger.com/profile/04803787760599939642noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578565573067310873.post-19355901716340283652010-02-06T23:41:30.010-08:002010-02-06T23:41:30.010-08:00You are so right! There are fast food places every...You are so right! There are fast food places everywhere! Within literally three blocks of my house there is a Wendy’s, White Castle, McDonalds, KFC, A&W, Sonic, and Taco Bell and three of them are on the same block! It is completely ridiculous and no wonder obesity is such a problem in America. Your group did a very nice job; the only thing I would say would be that is was a little hard to find your argument, or what the “other side” had to say about the issue. Maybe you could add a sentence or two about that, and you’d be perfect.Brookehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03169842302536526666noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578565573067310873.post-81948970648460530632010-02-06T22:32:55.451-08:002010-02-06T22:32:55.451-08:00I think your group did an excellent job of summari...I think your group did an excellent job of summarizing the argument that David Zinczenko makes. I think the ideas and opinions of the post are well stated and nicely organized. I do agree with Rachel that more could have been explained as to why the arguments of Schlosser and Campos are inferior to those of Zinczenko. Also the entire third paragraph uses arguments presented by Schlosser however you do not cite him at all. Overall I think the argument that Zinczenko makes is clearly explained although more could be said as to why his opinion is superior to those of the other authors.Kaylahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06331378606537100199noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578565573067310873.post-12228440439712330402010-02-06T21:39:36.633-08:002010-02-06T21:39:36.633-08:00You stated well what Zinczenko was trying to get a...You stated well what Zinczenko was trying to get across. Clearly stated that he believes people are responsible for their choices. It's up to the individual and what they decide to have as a meal. I liked the way you summarized the end of your work, but would have liked to see a a few more ending sentences. Interesting to read. Thanks.Kathy Rossihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03857191025547142762noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578565573067310873.post-74268436734557173502010-02-06T21:03:54.562-08:002010-02-06T21:03:54.562-08:00Even if you never used the other passages to enfor...Even if you never used the other passages to enforce why you thought this one was superior, I would have been convinced! Although, for the sake of this assignment, you probably could use a little more detail on WHY the other views were inferior. I completely agree with what you use to back up Zinczenko. Fast food is freakishly convenient. Even when they put "healthy items" on the menu, it is nearly impossible to resist an Angus burger next to some apple wedges.Rachelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13806062987052452002noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578565573067310873.post-62054544580973835352010-02-06T19:23:08.999-08:002010-02-06T19:23:08.999-08:00I think the writer’s argument was well supported. ...I think the writer’s argument was well supported. The marketing approaches were well covered and seem to be strong facts that support your argument. The marketing to children is especially strong since you kind of feel the kids are a little less knowledgeable about their food consumption. The points about having no other alternative fit well also since everyone has needed a quick and easy meal at some point in time. This is something that is relatable and that in my opinion helps an argument a lot.Aaron Jhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08000996556993594266noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578565573067310873.post-66228773592445349152010-02-06T19:12:47.166-08:002010-02-06T19:12:47.166-08:00Also, make sure your citations are alphabetized by...Also, make sure your citations are alphabetized by last name.Reneehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06715800676275137034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578565573067310873.post-33215501372764467882010-02-06T19:12:08.931-08:002010-02-06T19:12:08.931-08:00I think you did a nice job summarizing the beliefs...I think you did a nice job summarizing the beliefs captured in David Zinczenko's article. When you talked about Paul Campos' article, it seemed as though you were saying what Paul believed, but I think you could have added more detail as to why you didn't agree with it. You could pick out specific issues and then say why he's wrong, vs. just listing his thoughts. Also, you cited Eric Schlosser's article below your posting, but I didn't see any reference to him in your actual posting.Reneehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06715800676275137034noreply@blogger.com